I wasn't sure what forum to post this in because it's a multi-layered question. I hope this location is okay!
I have trichotillomania (for those of you who don't know: it's a disorder that makes me compulsively pull out my hair). Part of this disorder, for me, involves a nasty scalp itch. I find that my scalp does best with a mixture of shampoo bars and conventional (SLS, ALS) shampoos.
BUT -- The alcohols (cetearyl, cetostearyl, cetyl stearyl, stearyl, and cetyl alcohol) found in most conditioners make my scalp itching (and pulling) much, much worse. I find that if I don't use conditioner my hair is terribly dry, even at pixie-length. Because of the itchy scalp, I also can't go than more than one day without washing my scalp (believe me -- I've been trying to stretch washes since 2007 - it's not going to happen). CO of any kind is out of the question.
Right now I'm washing with a shampoo bar (neem and lavender) which I follow up with jojoba oil and sometimes aloe when my hair is still dripping wet.
So the problem is: without conditioner my hair is too dry, with it, itchy scalp and hair pulling.
ON TO THE QUESTION -- Can anyone recommend a conditioner without these alcohols? A shampoo bar that is ultra moisturizing so I can forget about conditioner altogether? A recipe for a homemade conditioner? Anything else I haven't thought of that could help both the dryness of my hair and the itchiness of my scalp?
Any advice or ideas will be greatly appreciated.